24. July 2008 by Ria.

I don’t why this episode is called the chunin exam, especially since it doesn’t happen for another week. Oh well, let’s check in on Naruto, who gets back from all that excitement just to end up giving Sasuke the cold shoulder again.

Now this is kind of weird, wasn’t he the one that was all tore up when he thought Sasuke was dead? Who knows, maybe he was just acting and deep down he really wanted Sasuke out of the picture for good.

Anyway, the gang is ready for the next mission, only thing is, the next couple of exercises are not that exciting. Once again Naruto tries to outdo Sasuke, but continues to get into trouble.

First he tries to beat Sasuke at pulling up weeds, but screws that up when he pulls up this lady’s herbs instead. Now here’s Naruto, supporting a new black eye, trying to pull garbage out of the water, but trips, and almost get trapped into a waterfall. Sasuke saves him, and calls Naruto a loser.

“Shut up Sasuke! If Naruto didn’t handle Haku in episode 17, you wouldn’t be around anymore, so you can kiss off!” Sorry, I didn’t mean to get off track, but that kid gets on my royal nerves.

Anyway, in the next mission they are walking dogs. Can you guess who picks the biggest dog who leads him into a mine field? You guessed it, and so now we have a burnt-to-a-crisp Naruto and dog on our hands.

Somehow Kakashi is tired (probably from reading Makeout Paradise), and he tells everyone to go home. Sakura hits on Sasuke one more time, but he’s really not interested in her. He says that she’s as bad as Naruto, and that she should be working on her jutsu instead of flirting. Wow, somebody just got TREATED!!!!

Anyway, Naruto runs into Konohamaru and his two bratty friends, and now he has to play Ninja with them. “Good luck getting out of this one Naruto.” Konohamaru mistakes Sakura for Naruto’s girlfriend, and I don’t hear him trying to deny it either.

Sakura gets pissed off and BAM! No more Naruto. At least, not for the next couple of minutes. Konohamaru calls her an ugly witch, and POW! No more Konohamaru for another couple of minutes.

Konohamaru retaliates by telling Sakura that she has a wide forehead, Uh oh, I guess the 1st grandson of the honorable hokage won’t be around too long. No, not because of Sakura, but because of this weird dude named Kankuro.

Not only is this guy an ugly beast, but he’s also a bully, look at what he’s doing to poor little Konohamaru! Naruto tries to step in, but this guy has a powerful attack to catch Naruto off guard. But guess who comes to the rescue?

You got it, every girl’s dream, and Naruto’s nightmare. As you see the girl’s love him! “Well Sasuke, get out there, and beat this guy Kankuro down to the ground since you’re supposed to be such a bad ass.”

Wait, now someone else has entered the picture, Gaara who stops Kankuro from taking further action. But who is this guy, and what does his gang want?

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24. July 2008 by Ria.

Once again another good episode, but I think the writers went a little overboard with Haku’s death. Before I get into that, let’s talk about Gato, who’s about to have his guys take Zabuza out since he’s too expensive to keep around.

Gato also kicks a dead Haku, and Naruto gets all pissed off, and demands that Zabuza do something about it. The thing is, why in the hell would Zabuza care about Haku now that he’s dead, when he didn’t give a snot about him when he was alive?

So it was no surprise to me that Zabuza turned his head the other way, and now Naruto is more pissed off than ever. He starts bitchin’ that Zabuza never let Haku have a dream of his own, and how it was so wrong to just kick him to the curb.

“But that’s the shinobi way Naruto, didn’t you know that?” Anyway, Zabuza thinks about this for a few moments, and starts crying, saying those words cut deep. Okay now, that’s a bunch of crap, Zabuza has been a self-centered jerk all this time, and now I’m supposed to believe that now in the end, he’s all choked up over Haku?

Now at this time, Zabuza decides to take off his mask, and I finally get to see that handsome face. Wait, what is this?

“ZABUZA, CAN YOU PLEASE PUT YOUR MASK BACK ON BEFORE I GET SICK?????” Of course he pays me no mind, but I’ve got a bottle of Mylanta in front of me just in case I start getting queasy. Now Zabuza arms are broken, but somehow he has enough ability to take Gato out.

Naruto loans him a knife, and miraculously, Zabuza is able to stab Gato and a bunch of guys with the knife in his mouth. Hmmmm, that must be a move that you pick up in ninja school, ’cause I’ve never seen that happen before!

Oh, did I tell you that Sasuke is alive? No, I’m not very thrilled about it, but at least Naruto will continue to have someone to hate. Anyway Gato’s goons decide to loot the village since a dead Gato can’t pay anyone. But, hey what’s this? All the villagers show up with Inari leading the way, and it’s about time!

Naruto and Kakashi get into the act by using their clone jutsus. Hey, I want one of those Kakashi clones, just as soon as they take a bath! After witnessing this, Gato’s goons wig out, then jump on a boat to make their escape.

Good, now I can end this review, well wait, Zabuza has the nerve to ask Kakashi for a favor, to die right along side Haku. Oh brother, “Zabuza, just die already, please.”

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17. July 2008 by Ria.

As you all know our little Inari is growing up, and now he’s not afraid of anything. So he goes to his uncle’s house to persuade him to join in the fight at the bridge. Only thing is, the old fart is a coward, and won’t even open the damn door.

“Don’t worry Inari, if you end up going alone, I’m sure Naruto will have your back.” Okay, now let’s get back to the bridge. Kakashi is owning Zabuza right now, and is about to use his new and improved lighting blade jutsu to end this once and for all.

Good, ’cause I can’t wait to get to the next episode. Now after this interesting conversation that goes on between Haku and Naruto, he pleads with Naruto to kill him, after all, he failed in his mission, and is now of no use to Zabuza, so why stick around?

Naruto is hesitant at first, and says that if they met under different circumstances, they could have been friends. Who knows, maybe if Haku would have kept that pink dress on, and didn’t tell Naruto he was a boy, they could have gone out on a date, and none of this would be happening.

But unfortunately it is happening, and we have to learn to live with it. Haku sensing that Zabuza is in danger, escapes Naruto’s final blow, to shield him from being struck down by Kakashi’s awesome attack.

I’d like to tell you what happens next, but I have to switch back to Inari for a second. Since no one will come with him to the bridge, he suits up rambo style, and decides to go on his own. You know, I really like this kid now, he’s all right. Mom doesn’t want him to go, but who gives a damn about what she wants, he’s going anyway. However, Inari is in for a big surprise when he steps outside his front door.

I’d like to tell you who’s there to greet him, but I have to get back to the bridge before I miss out on any of the action. Haku just took a fatal blow that was meant for Zabuza,who doesn’t even care. He even tries to slice through Haku to get to Kakashi, who quickly moves out of the way with Haku’s body.

Oh wait, we forgot about Sasuke who’s dead as a doornail. Take a good look at this picture, don’t you love how Sakura just flies right past Naruto to get to Sasuke? I’m telling you, she’s a real piece of work. She doesn’t even ask, “Naruto, are you okay? What happened to you? Did you kick Haku’s ass, ’cause if you did, I need all the juicy details.”

So now we have a real dramatic scene with Sakura crying all over Sasuke like the simpering idiot that she is. Doesn’t she understand that he would never cry over her like that?

After Sakura wastes my valuable viewing time with her ridiculous act, we can get back to Zabuza, who’s a complete mess right now. Every time he tries to get a lick in, Kaksashi knocks him on his butt, now both of his arms are broken.

To make things worst, Gato shows up with an army of goons to continue the fight. With Zabuza all jacked up, Kakashi out of chakra, Sasuke and Haku dead, Naruto devastated and Sakura (who can’t do anything anyway), in mourning, who’s gonna fight these guys?

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