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Okay, listen up all classic movie freaks, I want you to know this is Bela Lugosi month, yes, I know the month is almost over, so I have a lot of work to do, right? I will also be watching the Black Cat, and the Raven. Why all this Lugosi you ask? Well, all three movies came on one DVD rental, so I might as well review them all, right? Oh, I’ll try to throw in some Bogart, and another Hitchcock classic for the first week in April, so be on the lookout for those, now let’s get started.

First of all, thumbs down to Universal Pictures for using the same opening music theme for Frankenstein and Murders in the Rue Morgue, you cheapos! Anyway, the movie’s setting is Paris,1845, and there’s some kind of fair, or carnival going on. Here we meet the lamest couple in town, Camille (Sidney Fox), and Pierre (Leon Ames), and some of their friends who decide to take a peek at the sideshow that Dr. Mirakle (Bela Lugosi) has going on.

Now, Dr. Mirakle introduces everyone to Erik, an ape hanging out behind bars. Then he starts lecturing about the evolution of man, and how he can prove kinship between ape and man by mixing the blood of a gorilla, and a human. “Well Dr. Mirakle, this is all well and good, but those people didn’t come to your show to hear you spout off crap that they can learn from a Paleontology class, so unless the ape can shoot craps, do back flips, play Monopoly, or download stuff off YouTube, no one is interested, so pack up your stuff, and get the hell out of town!”

At the end of Dr. Mirakle’s lecture, Pierre, and Camille go up to meet Erik. Now at this point, the ape is kind and gentle, and extends a hand to Camille, a gesture in order to get her bonnet. So Camille takes off her bonnet, and gives it to him. Dr. Mirakle comes along and states that Erik has an eye for beauty.

I’m sure he’s talking about the bonnet, and not Camille, ’cause she’s really not all that, but I guess it doesn’t matter what I think, because Dr. Mirakle tries to get her address in order to send her a new bonnet. Well, that’s what he told her, but we all know the real reason is so that he can kidnap her, to try to mix her blood with Erik’s blood, so that he can create the perfect specimen.

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Pierre steps in and tells Dr. Mirakle in so many words, that there’s no need to send his girl a bonnet, and no reason to know where she lives, but Dr. Mirakle being the sneak that he is, follows Camille home. Now we have this lovey dovey scene going on where Pierre is saying crap to Camille like, how she’s pure and beautiful like a flower, and how she looks like a white morning star, with hair full of stardust. “That’s right, get all that mushy stuff out of the way now, ’cause in 10 years, you two won’t be able to look at each another without throwing up.”

Next scene, Dr. Mirakle is on his way home, when he witnesses two men fighting over a woman. The woman is crying her eyes out, while the two men kill each other. Dr. Mirakle invites the lady back to his place, where he ties her up, injects her with Erik’s blood, and she also dies. Next scene, Pierre, who’s a medical student, goes to the morgue to ask if he can view the new corpses that just came in, and maybe perform some kind of an autopsy.

The keeper of the morgue (D’Arcy Corrigan) agrees to deliver one of the corpses to him, for a fee. Next scene, Pierre is studying at home with his roommate Paul (Bert Roach) who’s slaving away over a hot stove making…………….macaroni and cheese? “So Paul, you’re wearing an apron just so you can make macaroni? Wait, what’s that stuff you’re putting on top of it?

Pierre, I wouldn’t eat that mess if I was you, it looks like your roommate just put some kind of a spaghetti sauce on top of that macaroni, so just give him some excuse like you’re too busy to eat now, so that you can spare yourself the misery of eating that garbage.”

Now lets skip a whole bunch of scenes, and go to this picnic that Camille and her friends are having. Camille tells Pierre, that she received a bonnet from Dr. Mirakle, along with a note for her to come visit him later on that night. Pierre is suspicious, and decides he’ll go in her place. That night Pierre once again meets Dr. Mirakle, and starts asking questions, now they’re both suspicious.

Dr. Mirakle realizes that if he’s gonna capture Camille, he’d better do it that night, so after Pierre leaves, he goes to her house and tries to persuade her to come with him, but she declines, and slams the door in his face. So now, Dr. Mirakle sends Erik after her, and everything after this point belongs in a King Kong movie. Camille sees ape, freaks out, then faints. “Camille, you are such a fool! Your life is on the line, and the best you can do is faint? You’re lucky that I can’t jump into that TV screen and smack you silly!”

Now Erik is on a rampage, he kills Camille’s mom, and shoves her up a fireplace, then he kills Dr. Mirakle, and flees to the top of the building with Camille. “Okay, Eric, now that you’ve made it to the top of the building, THROW HER OFF! But we all know that doesn’t happen, Pierre comes after her, saves her, and kills Erik, and that’s the end.

Click on link to get a glimpse of the trailer!

[3] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5I8T-xTR0hQ